Hey bartender, let's make it a double!

     So, I haven't lost much sleep over this whole cancer thing. I have it and I can't change that fact, so I just focus on treatment and moving on. I honestly feel like this is just a big pain in the ass. I could lose some very valuable beach days to this shit!  I have always had the idea in my head that I ever got breast cancer, I would have a double mastectomy, no questions asked. Well, I never really thought I would get cancer! WTF!
     So I went into my first surgical appointment with this point of view. My surgeon told me of all the statistical data against having a double mastectomy and even pointed out that lumpectomy + radiation has the same prognosis as mastectomy and doesn't change the survival rate. Having a double mastectomy leads to increase in recovery time, increased chance of complications, etc. Ok, I'll give those points to him..I will wait for my genetic testing results (this coming Monday)...or so I thought.
     So the topic to save lefty or not has weighed on me enough to make me lose sleep the past 2 nights.  I have been up to all hours reading all the research as well as breast cancer survivors stories. I really want to trust my gut and do the double, but seems like a decision not to be taken lightly! Really, what did lefty ever do to me, maybe he deserves a chance!
     Then today, at pre-school pick up(of all places) the decision became very clear. A breast cancer survivor came over to offer her support. I know that she is going in for a prophylactic mastectomy in 2 days. I told her of my struggle-to save lefty or not. She told me of her first cancer, treated by lumpectomy and other treatments, only to be followed by a recurrence in the same breast some years later which resulted in a mastectomy.  She is looking forward to removing her 'good breast' and said she wished she had done it 20 years ago.
     Done! To hear someone who has been through this battle say she wished she had done this procedure 20 years ago sealed the deal. I don't want to look back and say, "I should have", "I wish I had." I have a 4 year old and want to see her graduate kindergarten, go to prom, change the world with her huge, sweet heart! I can't miss those things and I would never forgive myself if I didn't do everything in my power to be there. I have never lived my life with regrets and won't start now because things are a little tough. Tell those you love how you feel, every day. They may not be here tomorrow!